I hate the engine in my chest

By Dcontortionist

I hate the engine in my chest

I hate the engine in my chest

I hate the rhythm it plays

I hate how easily it aches

I hate how ferociously it drops bars from within my ribcage

It roves sometimes, but I ususally hate where it choses to stay

It’s a wild beast yet so easily tamed

It powers my limbs, and the command center of the thoughts I

entertain

And just as it usually does, it’s most capable of leading me astray

Oh I could rip it out if it wasn’t the battery to my brain

How frustrating when it goes on to sync with the vibrations of

another

Tch! Like I asked it to resonate with any other

Unruly and presumpous it does more than I order

Leaving me tethered, not to a concept or thing but to a her

To the one being whose brain works much faster

Whose looks effortlessly makes one falter

Could this cursed engine have not harmonized with any better?

Forced to love my flaws and I blame her

I’m drawn to this femme force but I dislike her

Cemented in the abivalence of a love-hate relationship and she

was the matchmaker

I hate that my best comes from her

For how could she be the creator as well as the destroyer

She casts on me the spell of inspiration like an elden hexer

Oh how I hate that I love her

I know what this is, now I see the danger

So before I’m lost to the folly of this organ, completely devoured

by the curse of a lover, I must sanction my heart and relinquish it’s power

I hate this engine in my chest for it’s sweetness leaves me sour.

@Dcontortionist … Excerpts from “Dreams”